Learning to Chill?

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My whole life up until this point (post-grad) has been planned. I knew I would go from elementary school to middle school, through to high school and most-likely college or university. Being the luckiest daughter in the world, my parents saved up for my university education since I was born, so I was confident that if I wanted to do it, I could. And I did.

I’ve reached a point where I am done knowing the next step. I have my Bachelor of Arts, with a major in English and a minor in History, without much of a clue how to proceed to… life?

In my final year I decided to  to take this year as a “year off” to “figure out what I am going to do.”  This gives me a sense of purpose.

I have a vague idea of what I’d like to do. I’d like to pursue writing and learn a bit more about sustainable fashion; however, I am still in the headspace that figuring that part out is later down the road.

So when my friends offered me a place in their home in Montreal for the fall (now), I gladly accepted it. I worked in a restaurant all summer to save up and move to Montreal.

For the first time in a very long time, I don’t have many obligations. I can take time to read and learn about the world around me. I’ve given myself this time to reflect, to just be…and I don’t know how to do it! So accustomed to constant movement, scheduling, and sometimes stress, having time to relax has been so weird! It’s been amazing (SO AMAZING), but still something a bit foreign to me.

I remind myself that it’s going be okay! I will figure the next step soon enough and the time I have now may not come again. To be with my friends in a beautiful city at such a fantastic time in my life is so precious. Life is not about rushing, it’s about living. I must not forget how lucky I am to be here, at this time, without rushing into finding a career. A career does not mean life. This is life! And a career will come eventually. (I hope).

For now, I will learn to appreciate every day as it comes and be grateful for this magical adventure.

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